For individuals in the U.S. & U.S. territories
There’s a good chance you’ve had the “hook-up talk” with your parents. Or not. Or learned about human reproduction in health class. Or maybe you’ve heard a lot about dating, lovemaking, and relationships from friends, movies, and the internet.
So you are all set, right? Maybe…But there’s more information that you need to know — and indeed want to know — inwards this book.
Dating and Lovemaking is an awesome, easy-to-read, funny, and insightful book that is chock-full of information and advice to help you get ready for the world of dating, relationships, and hookup.
This book is your how-to guide to become a responsible and mature relational and sexual being. And then, you’ll be ready for just about everything.
Andrew P. Smiler, PhD, is a therapist and author residing in Winston-Salem, NC.
Dr. Smiler holds a PhD in developmental psychology from the University of Fresh Hampshire and a master’s degree in clinical psychology from Towson University.
Dr. Smiler is the author of Challenging Casanova: Beyond the Stereotype of the Promiscuous Youthfull Masculine (Jossey-Bass/Wiley) and co-author, with Chris Kilmartin, of the best-selling guys’s studies textbook The Masculine Self, 5th Edition (Sloan Publishing). He has authored more than 20 journal articles and book chapters relating to boys, studs, sexual development, and identity issues.
Dr. Smiler is a regular contributor to the Good Dudes Project and has also written for The Shriver Report, Role/Reboot, Huffington Post, and Everyday Feminism, among other venues.
- Bronze Medal for Youthful Adult Nonfiction, 2016 Foreword INDIES Book Awards
- Silver Medal Honors in the EUREKA! Excellence in Children’s Nonfiction Award
Smiler…has written an insightful and engaging work that investigates dating and hookup in a nonjudgmental manner…Overall, this is a refreshing work that covers a number of pertinent issues (bod pic, onanism, sexual identity, etc.) with sensitivity and clarity.
Dating and Hook-up: A Guide for the 21st Century Teenage Boy does a superb job of presenting information about healthy relationships, lovemaking, consent, puberty, and more in a friendly and fact-based way. Smiler is a therapist and researcher who specializes in masculine sexual development and relationships, and his extensive skill of and practice with his subject are evident across.
Even however Dating and Lovemaking: A Guide for the 21st Century Teenage Boy is written especially for youthfull dudes, it is packed with practical, invaluable wisdom for readers of all ages and both genders…Highly recommended, for public and school library collections, and a ‘must-read’ for teenagers everywhere.
It’s for boys who need answers to questions they don’t even know they have…Smiler does an excellent job of urging boys to consider what type of people they are—what makes them tick, what makes them unique—and reminds them frequently how that will switch and evolve for the rest of their lives.
I am so very grateful for this book, for Smiler’s frank, measured, comprehensive discussion of sexiness for boys. I’ve already collective it with friends’ high-school aged sons and they all give it two big thumbs up!
—Peggy Orenstein, author of Cinderella Ate My Daughter and Chicks &, Hookup: Navigating the Complicated Fresh Landscape
Every boy will find himself in the pages of Andrew Smiler’s Dating and Hookup: A Guide for the 21st Century Teenage Boy. It speaks honestly to boys in their own language without ever talking down to them. The content is inclusive of the broad spectrum of ways teenage boys define and practice themselves, and the illustrations are engaging, clear, and useful. I very recommend this book and am delighted to add it to my own classroom library of resources on healthy sexiness.
—Al Vernacchio, MSEd, author, For Goodness Lovemaking: Switching the Way We Talk to Teenagers About Sexiness, Values, and Health
In a society saturated by either disinformation or mis(sing) information, it’s more than just “refreshing” to ultimately have a book that lays it all out for guys. It’s imperative. Andrew Smiler’s even-handed, judicious, and down-to-earth book will become the go-to book for teenage guys—and those who love them.
—Michael Kimmel, PhD, SUNY Distinguished Professor of Sociology and Gender Studies, author, Manhood in America and Guyland: The Perilous World Where Boys Become Fellows
Hey guys! Have you ever had questions about switches to your bod, how to ask someone for a date, how to determine whether to have lovemaking, or how to be careful and considerate of your fucking partner if you do have hookup? If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, then this is the book for you. Written by Dr. Andrew Smiler, a national accomplished on boys and their needs, Dating and Hookup is a indeed cool, easy-to-read, and helpful book that will prepare you for the world of dating from now through your early adult years.
—Mark Kiselica, PhD, psychologist and author, When Boys Become Parents: Adolescent Fatherhood in America
This is a wonderful book! It should mandatory for all boys (and damsels would find it a good learning practice, too). It’s right on target with the things boys want to know. They can be a rough audience to reach, and if any book has the chance to do so, this one does.
—Joanne Davila, PhD, professor and director of clinical training, Department of Psychology, Stony Brook University
There is so much misunderstanding about adolescent masculine sexiness and about adolescent masculines, so much that there is a distance inbetween who boys actually are and who we think they are. Dating and Lovemaking goes a long way towards sensitizing the reader to normal adolescent masculine development without making it scary or abnormal. Parents may wish to read it as well to better understand the adolescent masculines in their life. This is a superb resource for psychologists and counselors, too.
—Matt Englar-Carlson, PhD, professor, Department of Counseling, California State University, Fullerton
Some people think that what it means to be a man is switching. Dr. Smiler cleverly reminds us that the only thing switching is society’s very narrow definition of a traditional masculine. This book helps the cause. It’s an eye opener for any parent.
—Wendy Walsh, PhD, clinical psychologist and host, The Dr. Wendy Walsh Showcase, iHeartMedia’s KFI AM Los Angeles
What a excellent contribution to the psychology of sexual health and relationships literature! Teenage boys will love this book because of its direct, no-nonsense treatment, and parents will embrace it because it contains information that they may want to discuss with their teenage sons yet may be awkward talking about. As a psychologist, I would suggest it to others to use in their practice with their clients and parents of clients. I actually would like to have a copy for my own pre-teen sons!
—Linda R. Mona, PhD, chief consultant and director of clinical operations, Inclusivity Clinical Consulting Services
As they come in the world of puberty, dating, lovemaking, and romance, teenage boys are often confused or ill informed. Dr. Smiler has astutely and judiciously anticipated the questions teenage boys have about becoming youthfull fellows. However geared toward boys, this book will prove critical for their parents and anyone else who cares for the sexual and romantic wellbeing of teenage boys. Based on Dr. Smiler’s extensive reading of the research literature on sexual and romantic development during adolescence, this is advice at its best.
—Ritch C. Savin-Williams, PhD, professor of developmental psychology, Cornell University
Issues of consent, gender roles, stereotypes, and the often-confusing and little-discussed emotions in boys’ early sexual practices add up to a substantive, thorough treatment of the topic.
As a father (Four boys and 1 damsel) and grandfather (Ten boys and Five chicks), I can’t think of a better book for youthful fellows and women or for their parents. As a psychotherapist who specializes in studs’s issues, I also very recommend Dating and Lovemaking: A Guide for the 21st Century Teenage Boy. There are few books that are accurate, accessible, and joy to read. I recommend it very to all.
—Jed Diamond, PhD, LCSW, author The Enlightened Marriage: The Five Transformative Stages of Relationships and Why the Best is Still to Come
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750 Very first St. NE, Washington, DC 20002-4242 | Contact Support